Who changed the rules? The Ten Commandments

March 21, 2013 by Naphtali 2 Comments

1.       You shall have no other gods before me.

What? U mean God is supposed to be first? Above everything and everyone?

America must be in real trouble then.

 

YES. AMERICA IS IN TROUBLE.

 

2.       You shall not make for yourself any graven image.

Do you mean like an idol? Does that include “American Idol?

 

OH PLEASE. GROW UP.

 

 

3.       You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain.

 

So does this mean I have to stop swearing? What about R rated movies? They sure do use foul language but I just ignore it. God doesn’t really care if we cuss does he? Think about it; everyone does it.

 

NOT EVERYONE. I DON’T.

 

4.       Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy.   

 

You must be kidding; I have no idea what the definition of “holy” is. So that must mean it doesn’t apply to me.

 

 YEAH RIGHT. WHY DON’T YOU ASK GOD OR READ THE BIBLE?

 

5.       Honor your father and your mother.

 My parents aren’t worth my time. They never did a thing for me. If anything they owe me.

 

GOD DIDN’T OWE YOU ANYTHING EITHER, BUT JESUS DIED FOR YOU ANYWAY.

 

6.       You shall not murder.  

That one is easy. I would never do that. And the government has endorsed abortion. They also let out a whole bunch of illegal’s who were imprisoned for DUI. Oh. If they get drunk and drive, and accidentally kill someone that is not considered murder is it? It was an accident after all.

 

First of all go tell that to the mother who is barren. Just because the government endorses anything, doesn’t make it right. Second; illegal or not it doesn’t matter, it is still a matter of killing an innocent human being. Oh and you might want to steer clear of MADD. You know the group called “Mothers Against Drunk Driving?” They are on the warpath now since those prisoners were released. To be honest, a bunch of angry women are capable of almost anything. There is a scripture in the Bible they refer to a lot. It says,

 

Luke 17:2: “It would be better for them to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around their neck than to cause one of these little ones to stumble.”

UGH. YOU HAVE NO EXCUSE.

 

7.       You shall not commit adultery.

Oh wow. Now that is a tricky rule. Not sure I like it at all. What if I don’t want to get married? And I sure don’t want to be labeled a primeval! How embarrassing! What about all my gay friends? Does this apply to them?  The government and many people are endorsing it now?

 

First of all, the least of your worries is what you may be labeled. If you don’t want to get married, fine. Don’t have sex. With anybody.

Matthew 15: 19 “For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies “(that takes care of a lot)

As far as homosexuality? First of all, no one is born that way. It is a choice and a result of sin. (Romans 1: 26-27) It is evil and straight from the pit of hell. Guess what God calls it?

Leviticus 18: 22 “You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination.”

The definition of an abomination is: extreme disgust and hatred: loathing. A person or thing that is disgusting; an action that is vicious, vile, etc.

DO YOU GET THE PICTURE NOW?

8.       You shall not steal. This is self –explanatory. Anyone with any brains at all knows what this means. If not, then they need a new brain.

9.       You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.

Is this like accusing someone of something when they didn’t do it?  Oh yeah. This is just like Washington and our political leaders. They’re always lying about each other.

Don’t lie. Don’t perjure yourself; it is a violation or infringement.

It is kind of like the person who plays with fire. Eventually they get burned.

 

10.   You shall not covet.

What if I am envious or jealous?

THEN GET OVER IT.

GOD HASN’T CHANGED. THE TEN COMMANDMENTS HAVEN’T CHANGED.

AND THAT IS JUST THE WAY IT IS WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT.