Years ago I spent my summers working in our church conference center. Many wonderful and endearing friendships came out of those memorable seasons. And also some real jerks.
And there he was. The man of my dreams.
Girls flocked around him.
Guys envied him.
Me? I just wanted him to notice me.
When he finally did, I knew I had met my first love. Ugh. Gag.
The next year in high school would be a very long one. Knowing that seeing him wouldn’t be until the next summer was excruciating. UPDATE: he spoke to me one time.
The future held no other course but to once again see him from a distance.
What could be wrong? He came from a very prestigious family. Intelligent. Political minded. He spoke with clarity and as if he knew more than most. His looks sure didn’t hurt. He was perfect.
The last summer before college he was there. He had a girlfriend. She was there too.
My dream was shattered.
The first semester of college was extraordinary.
Half way through the semester one of the college staff members invited me to a homecoming game at a nearby arch rival college.
Making a quick trip to the hot dog and coke stand but who do I run into?
Yes. He was right in front of me. And this time he really noticed.
He asked me for my phone number.
He called. We went out 5 times. Our last date he became angry over the most ridiculous and trivial matter. He dropped me off in front of my dorm and drove off. I never saw or heard from him again.
Good riddance jerk.
The pattern of always needing something to look forward to ran through my veins until one day God showed me that was no way to live.
Attempting to have a calendar of “fun” was forcibly changed. Survival mode had set in.
Soon, the joys of looking forward to anything good became thoughts of waking up without being scolded or yelled at by a sinister husband.
That changed into thoughts of how soon and quickly can I leave him.
10 years into the role of being everything to everyone, I yearned for peace and quiet; to be honest I wanted to run away. For most single parents, this is the life led. Exhaustion, weariness, inability to do it all and unmistakably labeled. By then, just waking up and realizing I was still alive was my future plans.
I had all but forgotten what it was like to remotely think of having a vacation, or a day to myself. In fact, those thoughts rarely occurred and when they did I laughed it off as a silly notion. HOW DARE I THINK OF HAVING, MUCH LESS PLANNING A DAY TO MYSELF?
The man who knows the value of a good meal, is the man who is starving.
The woman who is ill knows the value of good health.
The family who lives in poverty knows the importance of having a roof over their heads.
Now the truth is I don’t make plans. God broke me of doing it so long ago that living one day at a time is my plan. Or God’s plan.
In the midst of all the years of pain, loss and difficulties God taught me so often we make plans that are stained with greed, selfishness and personal promotion.
Whatever our plan may be, if God isn’t in it, it will never live up to our expectations. Disappointment will be a dominate factor until we make up our minds to ask God what he wants us to do.
Blessings pour from the abundance God has for us as we learn that his ways and thoughts are always better than ours. Living for God one day at a time rejects any idea we are missing out on anything or are settling for less.
Heather McCoy is a perfect example of living life one day at a time. She understands the true meaning and importance of health. While most of us take breathing for granted, Heather has waited her 20 years on earth to be able to breathe normally. She aligned her plans with God’s mission which has proven to be a miracle of healing.
Her walk has been in the classroom of God’s “divine nature.” She graduated from the college of God’s chosen.
As she continues to improve and recover from a double-lung transplant, her story is reaching people all over the globe offering hope, joy unspeakable and a love for living life as God intended; as a true disciple.
Heather’s cross has been heavier than most to bear but she learned early on from the Master Cross Bearer how to carry it better than anyone I have ever seen.