God, why is this taking so long?

 

As I imposed that question to the Creator he reminded me of a few Biblical characters that waited and waited and waited for the dream he placed inside of them to come true.

Noah spent 120 years building the ark. I award him the greatest “builder” award in history.

Abraham and Sarai waited for 20 years to have that child God promised.

Moses herded sheep for 40 years before God gave him the worst job on earth; putting up with the Israelites.

David ran from Saul and hid in caves for months at a time.

We know how Paul suffered multiple injuries and beatings, starvation, getting shipwrecked, imprisoned who knows how many times and for how many years….

Were these people slow learners?

Were they lacking faith in believing what God had promised them?

Did they waver in doubt and anxiety that maybe, just maybe what they thought they heard was a figment of their wild imagination?

I admit the struggle here for me has not been fun, easy or at all what my life would be at this point in time. Then I realize God’s sustenance.

My next big questions for God are, “as these great men of yours were pursuing this dream, destiny or what ever it was did you give them updates? Did you speak to them daily? or were you silent for months, or years on end without a word of encouragement?”

120 years to build a boat that entertained laughter from your friends about how crazy you are for thinking for one moment God told you to do it?

And that burning bush idea? Yeah, right.

“Abraham, you will be the Father of many nations….” Sure. Go tell your friends that one especially since you are what, 80 years old?

My point here is the test. God gives us a dream, a purpose or the destiny for which He created us for our time on this ugly, mean earth. Why? Because there has to be good in the midst of all the evil.

All of a sudden I received a download of revelation about why I’ve spent the last 19 years in and out of weird health issues. And I’m still dealing with them but now I know what’s taking so long; why this is happening and possibly my future in it. 

Not that I am Moses, Abraham or David or any resemblance but they possibly learned some of the same things I have while “waiting.”

We first learn how much God loves us which brings us to humble ourselves before Him in ways we never thought we would. 

We learn how to discern the truth from the devil’s lies. 

We are taught in the process how other’s feel going through their “seasons of waiting.”

We learn rejection and abandonment either brings us closer to God or further away.

Comparing ourselves to others only demeans the destiny and damages our character; therefore stop doing it.

Embarrassment becomes a non-issue so that persecution, being laughed at and bullied are the least of our worries.

We find out what is really important, and who is really in charge which results in total dependence on God for everything.

We are tested for our faith so that when God allows us to enter our “Ark” we are ready. That’s right. God often allows the fiery furnace to burn to make sure we can handle what will happen once that door of heat flies open letting us out into the world of wolves dressed in sheep’s clothing.

Years ago God gave me Isaiah 40:43 “Fear not [there is nothing to fear], for I am with you; do not look around you in terror and be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen and harden you to difficulties, yes, I will help you; yes, I will hold you up and retain you with My [victorious] right hand of rightness and justice.”

God qualifies the unqualified. And if I have the idea of what He is qualifying me to do, I  respond as Moses did when he said to God, “why me? I am the most unqualified person to do what you are asking. Please get someone else!”

Graduation is always a great reward. God wants to make sure we are ready before He fits us for that golden cap and gown waiting in our closets.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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The Trials of Testing

Do you feel beat up by life?

Do you feel your world is crashing around you only to engulf you with its demise?

Well, you’re not alone.

Many of us are being tested to the hilt.

Many of us are barely holding on to the next second.

Many of us are weary, worn out and sad.

Getting slapped over and over not only becomes old but it hurts.

And we who believe in God wonder, “Where are you?”

For me, it has been the last 6 years especially.

My father became very ill and then passed away in 2014. I was very close to him.

My mother has Alzheimer’s. She will be 87 on August 31.

It was time to move mom out of the house I grew up in. I had no idea receiving some of her prized furniture and possessions would make me so sad.

The lack of close family and friends has been partly due to where I live; otherwise it’s just the way it is.

And then my allergies to dust have been at times debilitating to say the least. If it’s not the reaction itself that makes me miserable, the meds make up for it. I have jokingly blamed my mother for making me grow up in an immaculate house.

This is a short list of my life and its deteriorating factors.  Add to that the surrounding world mess and it’s been a recipe for depression and anxiety.

The truth is I wouldn’t be writing this if God wasn’t pulling me up every second out of this grief.  Finally admitting to myself how sad I have been over the many different kinds of losses was a step God wanted me to make because without a doubt it led me to understand how He is in control and manages everything.

Zephaniah 3:17

The Lord your God is with you,
the Mighty Warrior who saves.
He will take great delight in you;
in his love he will no longer rebuke you,
but will rejoice over you with singing.”

Arriving at this conclusion erased most of the past 61 years of thinking. In other words, my mind is being renewed to a constant awareness of His presence and that I really can’t do anything without Him.

Our dear friend Paul wrote in 2nd Corinthians 1: 9
“Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.”

I feel Paul’s pain.

I feel his words ripping through me like a sword.

I feel his gripping fear of the next move.

But as he found out, so am I that God is faithful.

I may not have arrived, but I left only because God is with me to make the next step or the shift into the next minute.  In the literal sense, God is holding me together.

Jesus is our hope.

Jesus is our future.

Jesus is the answer to our misguided efforts to get through anything.

Jesus is.