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Christianity 0ut of the Box

This is the Way I Am


Sorry, no it’s not.

Just because you inherited negative family traits doesn’t give you the right to keep them. Honestly, I hear people using the crutch of recovering from alcoholism, drug addiction or whatever addiction as if it gives them the right to excuse bad behavior.


The idea one who is recovering should be given special treatment is ludicrous. No one made you drink Strawberry Hill. No one made you smoke dope. No one clicked the porn site but you. No one made you do anything. It was your choice.

Coming from a family with a history of alcoholism, I have seen and heard it all. Maybe I am slow on understanding here, but I came from the same genes they did and I don’t drink.

I found it rather astonishing years ago when one member of my family drank hard liquor and moonshine most of his life. That was until he was 65 and the doctor strongly advised him,

“If you don’t stop now, you will be dead in 5 years.”

He quit. Never touched it again and even stopped smoking. Lived to be 85 and died from heart disease.

Another family member had the same death sentence from another doctor. Ditto.

So tell me, if a person can quit all of a sudden, cold turkey later why not do it sooner?

Why impose your self-centered lifestyle on the rest of us for years on end?

Why burden others with your lack of disrespect for them?

Why should friends and family pick up the pieces of your hangover?

This behavior is not limited to addictions.

Anger, frustration, immaturity, foul language, gossiping, bullying, abuse are examples of “this is the way I am and I can’t change it.”

Oh, yes you can.

Don’t think for one minute you deserve anything for your egocentric attitude.

A lack of etiquette is no alibi for making other people miserable.

What we do affects others around us. Some are generational curses handed down over and over.

All it takes is one person to stop it. What we allow will continue.

On the other side of this coin is the enabler; the one who will do almost anything to keep the peace with one who claims an addiction or self prescribed enslavement. The enabler simply adds to the narcissistic vanity instead of exposing them.

The addictive or abusive behavior is almost always surrounded with lies. Lies that lead to secret displays of wrongdoing.

As God teaches us about his truth, we are given wisdom for transparency. The ability to perceive the lies opens the door for communication.

No doubt one who endangers themselves and others with untreatable habits needs help. However excusing them over and over is not the answer.

Having witnessed these lifestyles more than I ever wanted to, my compassion runs thin. Usually the most compassionate in the bunch, I am not fooled by the desires of self-pitying rituals that create their own cliffs to fall off of.

The fueled language of “I am an addict” or “you can’t drink because I am in recovery”  are words of a controlling manipulator.  Get over yourself.
These scapegoats of iniquities are not the way you are; it is the way you choose to be.

Don’t ask me to be your doormat. I am all out of sympathy.





Copyright @ 2012 All Rights Reserved

6 thoughts on “This is the Way I Am

  1. I don’t know the exact answer why some people get free from their addictions and some do not. Sometimes, it may be more than a physical condition, maybe a demonic influence. I’ve seen some just walk away after making up their minds and I’ve seen some delivered by the power of God. But I’ve seen lots who are never set free.

  2. i liked this. straight up and out front!!! good job!

  3. “Anger, frustration, immaturity, foul language, gossiping, bullying, abuse are examples of “this is the way I am and I can’t change it.”

    Addictions take so many, varied forms. And you are right about ego-centrism…it comes down to loving self more than loving God, loving a substance more than the Son.

  4. The most difficult thing in following God is denying self. Good post. I will read it to my husband. Hope it helps. Lol. Thanks.

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